Heaven and Hell

by Andrew G. Watters

November 11, 2018


I stood at the end of a continent,
A river of lava coursing into an ocean of it,
The Shores of Hell beckoning.
A devil rose before me in the form of a
Brazen bull spewing flame from its snout,
With red coals dropping from its mouth.
Its eye sockets were red, and the eyes white.
A hinged flap on its side flipped open,
Revealing a glowing interior, apparently
Meant for me, and meant to begin my suffering.

I stood in disbelief, having wondered "why now?"
For long enough to also wonder "why me?"
Then a dark angel manifested; a handsome
Humanoid man with obsidian for skin and molten silver
for hair, and rubies for eyes.  The angel spoke to me,
Asking if I was ready.  I told him yes, but I could not move.
So he prodded my back with a trident, forcing me to 
Walk toward the cruel metal device standing nearby.

As I reached out to touch the bull's leg, I felt the heat
radiating from it.  It felt like a red-hot stove.
I climbed the bull's leg, and the hot metal burned
My bare hands and feet.  I screamed prematurely.
The angel just laughed.

"Continue," he said.  I did my best to suppress my
Reflexes and continue the climb.  I reached the
Opening in the device.  A blast of superheated air 
Hit my face, and my eyelashes singed.
The oven in front of me looked nothing like I had imagined.
There were skulls and bones lying intact on the "floor."
A recent addition just before me lay near the opening,
Burnt to a crisp.

I climbed in, and I heard a sizzling sound where my skin
Met the brazen bull's inner surface, the water in my body
Vaporizing upon contact and making me lose my grip.
I half-slid, half-fell into the middle of the metal creature,
Hearing my own involuntary screams as a disembodied voice.

The angel stepped into the bull, immune to its heat.
The angel bound my hands and feet in chains
Before stepping back out and closing the lid.
The hinged lid shut with a terrifying clang, and darkness
Enveloped me.

I screamed until I couldn't scream anymore.
Once my eyes burned shut, I found myself in an 
Even darker blackness, the heat coursing through my
Entire body, my own blood stoking an internal fire.

My blood started to boil.  Although I could no longer feel my body,
I retained enough consciousness to realize that my
Brain was on fire.
Whatever cruel thing I did during my life to deserve this
was surely less bad than the torture, the cleansing, and the horror.
The horror.

I lost consciousness, but I felt my body expel my soul as
Steam rising from my remains.

I rose through the interior of the brazen bull,
Through its nostrils and into the "air" in Hell.
I rose and rose, and I became aware of other
Souls rising as well.  It was a hot fog of depersonalized
Beings.

As the fog rose above Hell, I could "see" more
and more of the landscape.  The lava river flowing into
the lava ocean was just one of many such rivers.
And there were more brazen bulls than just mine.
And there were more fallen angels than just mine.
I rose with the other souls beyond the atmosphere of
This Hellish planet, and I saw the glowing firmament
Receding beneath me.

Silence.  Coolness.  Death.
I rose through space and time until there was 
Nothing but blackness.
I spent half an eternity in this blackness, minding
the silence by entertaining myself with thoughts.
After at least a century, I saw a faraway point of light.  
It looked like a star the size of a pinpoint but 
a hundred times brighter than the Sun.

The other souls around me seemed to see the light as well.
The light grew larger and larger as I got closer to it.
It became apparent that the light was a shining planet,
But it was an extraordinarily bright planet.

Approaching the planet, I saw a massive gate where souls were
Lining up to enter.  They had returned to their normal forms,
Condensing from vapor into vague personal shapes.
In front of the gate stood a giant angel with ivory for skin 
And a golden helmet, and white-feathered wings.  
A steel battle ax was slung over his shoulder.
He said this to the assembled souls: "YOU ARE NOT WORTHY."

I guess this must be the entrance to Heaven.
I was shocked to go to Hell, even temporarily.
So I felt shocked at the presumed Saint Peter's pronouncement,
Because I thought I had lived a purposeful and a worthy life.

I tried to shuffle through the crowd of souls to get to the
Front and plead my case.  As I grew closer, I saw 
the angel look in my direction, and I nearly withered.
His cold blue eyes locked with mine, and his gaze
Did not leave me.  He took the axe from his back and
held it in one hand.

I reached the angel's feet, and at first I didn't know what to say.
As I was about to speak, the angel started speaking instead.
His voice sounded like thunder, and each word felt like a hammer blow.
He spoke loudly and angrily, with angry eyes:
"LAWRENCE ANDREW GEORGE.  I KNOW WHO 
YOU ARE.  YOU ARE A THIEF AND A CRIMINAL.
YOU HAVE STOLEN FROM PEOPLE WHO TRUST YOU.
YOU HAVE ABUSED YOUR GIFTS IN THE SERVICE OF EVIL.
YOU HAVE REFUSED THE CALL TO SERVE YOUR FELLOW MAN.
YOU HAVE SHUNNED WOMEN WHO LOVED YOU.
YOU ARE NOT WORTHY OF WALKING WITH GOD."
I felt the accusations in the depths of my soul.  And I honestly believed
He was wrong.  So I attempted to plead my case:
"Your honor, I was born into a demanding family that
discouraged me from following what I thought at the
time were dreams.  I was born with a genetic predisposition
to indecision, despite my many gifts.  I tried to use my gifts
as best I could, and I also tried to support myself by doing
things that mattered.  I refused the call because I didn't know
it was a call, and also I couldn't afford it.  Economics dictated
that I do something that paid well so I could pursue things
that had meaning.  I did not steal; I achieved results in return 
for payment that ended up being lower than the results.  So I disagree
with you.  To the extent I did anything seriously wrong, I apologize.
But I will not apologize for things that either don't matter
or are inconsequential to what I was trying to achieve.  Thank you."
For a moment, the angel just stared at me.  Then he pronounced judgment.
"I FIND YOU WOEFULLY UNQUALIFIED TO ENTER THIS REALM.
BUT I AM INFORMED THAT YOUR CREATOR WISHES TO MAKE
AN EXCEPTION FOR YOU DUE TO YOUR MITIGATING 
CIRCUMSTANCES.  I WISH TO MAKE IT CLEAR THAT 
IF IT WERE UP TO ME, YOU WOULD BE DAMNED TO HELL
FOR ETERNITY.  BUT IT IS NOT UP TO ME."
The angel's gaze softened.
"Lawrence, you have demonstrated in your life a deep caring for
the needs of other people, if not a caring for other people.
You are a monument to truth, if nothing else, and that militates 
in your favor by just enough to tip the scales.  Therefore, by 
the power vested in me, I am conditionally admitting you to
this realm with the understanding that you must continue to behave
in accordance with God's divine plan for you. Now enter,
and don't look back."

The angel raised the gate just high enough that I still had to crouch
to walk through.  I walked through, and the clamoring of souls 
Behind me faded.  Before me I saw a tropical paradise.  An oasis.
An ocean of blue water lapped at crystal beaches.
Families of humanoid beings sat on the beaches and played.
I found myself walking through the ocean toward the shore,
Baptized by sea water as I shed my dirty clothes.

I walked onto the shore and was greeted by another angel, this one
in the form of a human female except for her wings.
She guided me toward what looked like a temple in the distance.
The temple was an edifice made of gold in the style of Solomon's Temple
on Earth.

As I walked through the doors, I saw a golden throne sitting empty
in the center of the temple.  And then I heard the voice.

The voice said: "I am your creator.  You have been conditionally admitted to Heaven with the understanding that you live honorably and rationally.  Otherwise, I will either send you back to Earth or damn you to Hell."

I said: "the penitent man is humble.  I will accept whatever fate God decides."
I prostrated myself and prepared to accept God's judgment.

"Rise, my son.  You have proved yourself worthy through courage
and self-sacrifice.  These are the qualities of a leader.  I decree
that you shall have a second life on Earth, where your mission
is to lead a noble, purposeful, and worthy life in the service of your
fellow man.  You shall ultimately sacrifice yourself for the greater good, and
if you do all of these things, you shall live in Heaven for eternity."

I accepted the Faustian bargain and committed to my second chance being a better reflection of God's wishes.  I left the temple and was teleported back to Earth, and I lost consciousness.  I knew that if I indeed received a second chance, I had better use it and live an equally full life.  This sole memory remained with me, and when I first realized it, I understood the gravity of my charge.  I lost one life, and gained another.  From childhood I dedicated myself to
selfless pursuits, and I tried to live the life God told me to live.  Only time will
tell whether I succeeded.

--

"I KNOW IN MY HEART THAT MAN IS GOOD.  THAT WHAT IS RIGHT WILL ALWAYS EVENTUALLY TRIUMPH.  AND THERE IS PURPOSE AND WORTH TO EACH AND EVERY LIFE."
- Ronald Reagan